Say You Don't Want It

Don't you ask me if it's love, my dear. Love don't really mean a thing 'round here.

12,256 notes

mom:
you realize normal people don't have such strong feelings about the oxford comma
me:
THE OXFORD COMMA IS IMPORTANT
mom:
you realize this makes you a nerd
me:
mom:
me:
i had a party with the strippers, george bush and barack obama
me:
i had a party with the strippers, george bush, and barack obama
me:
without the comma, you are implying that george bush and barack obama are strippers
mom:
me:
mom:
this isn't normal

150,785 notes

*Hears noises at night*:
Well this is it, this is the end for me. I had a good life.
*Gets shampoo in my eyes*:
I guess I'm blind now. How am I going to go on? Holy shit!
*Heart is beating fast*:
I think I am having a heart attack. Is this what cardiac arrest is?
*A cop walks by*:
Here I go, about to get arrested. I probably murdered someone. I'm sure they know about when I smoked that one time.
*Taking a test*:
Don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school.
*Gets a sunburn*:
Skin cancer.

16,793 notes

cisbender:

when an artist wants to show you their art

or a writer wants you to read what they’ve written

it’s quite often an expression of trust

because a poem or a story or a painting are often things that come from the heart

little pieces of the artists themselves

and if they’re willing to share it with you

you should appreciate it

(via 87daysbefore)